Monday, May 29, 2006

ethical issue about writing a blog about our child

Mathijs went to a "Summit for the Future" conference and someone mentioned there the ethical issue of writing a blog to our children. As soon as the children grow and they have mates who are able to read, they will be able to read such blogs too. Even more, future employers may have access to this info and all can be used for or against our children.

We decided that as soon as Timur will become 6, or may even earlier, we will stop having this blog available to a wide public.

If anyone has more info, an interesting article, or simply opinion on this issue, please don't hold back.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Timur climbed out of the swimming pool...

...to get a ball. Timur eagerly plays with a ball in the water at the swimming lesson. Papa put the ball on "shore", since Timur was supposed to sit on the edge of the pool. The ball immediately rolled away and Timur climbed out of the pool to get it. Most parents were surprised to see his brave and skillful moves. ...Unfortunately, at these special moments I usually do not have the camera on me.

'zo mooi als een meisje'

...zei een vriendelijke, dikke, zwarte mama een tijdje geleden. Kijk eens...

Meer foto's om te bewonderen: http://www.flickr.com/photos/timurvz

Monday, May 15, 2006

As Time Goes By

Fatherhood is something that grows on you. A lot of friends have asked me over the past months what does it feel like to be a father. I find myself somewhat dumbfounded, unable to clearly answer that question. "It" does not "feel" terribly different from before, I don't feel like a changed man. It is easy to be proud, especially with Timur who is such a wonderfully happy child, and I feel very proud. But pride is not a feeling, it is a liability closely related to arrogance and egotism.

But there is a change, it is not a change on the level of feeling, it is deeper. I have never encountered anything that is so powerful in putting things in perspective. Values, daily priorities used to be more problematic, more messy, more complex, and hence more stressful, because choices, reasons, motivations, urgencies all played before my mind's eye in a kaleidoscope of possibilities. Making the right choices could be an arduous process, not seldom leaving one with a sense confusion or regret, whenever a 'wrong' choice was made.

Timur made all this much simpler. He is an absolute existential priority, and it puts a whole bunch of things in proper perspective. What he needs from me is both simple and somewhat of a new experience. He just wants attention and the possibility of enjoying existence together. He is not interested in what I know, what I can do, how much money I make, if I can finish the project in time... He doesn't care about the petty annoyances of modern existence... Life is a very simple and spontaneous business, and every moment I spend with him is a powerful reminder of this fact. Because the truth is that Life is a simple and spontaneous business. Functioning in today's society may not be, but that is only a limited part of reality.
I am grateful that this is happening. I notice that I start making choices with less anxiety, I reject requests that are not important (allthough they may be urgent). Life looks a bit more like life now. Thank you for that feeling Timur.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Timur stood up last week

Timur stood up by holding my trousers

To our great surprise Timur stood up about 1,5 weeks ago. (Sorry, I had no time to tell this news earlier.) He can already sit much better than before, but he still doesn't sit as often as he decides to stand up. He makes a circle and then tries again and again. He seems to enjoy standing up much more than sitting. He is looking for challenge. He is not happy with crawling where everything is flat. He wants to crawl over our legs and whatever else he can find to crawl over. He also likes books, but the most interesting is to chew on paper. I'm not sure how much paper he has already eaten. :(

Oh, ho-ho-ho-hooooo...